Johnny Clusterfuck was a 7 foot tall, 350 pound human-pitbull hybrid with a glass left eye and a scrotal sac filled with battery acid. Betty thought she could handle the big lug, but she thought wrong, epically wrong. One cross word and the circuit was closed and it was on: He all frothy and deadly, […]
“Here on the first of crazy, we eat what we kill” (cut to grinning clutch of 2 girls and 1 boy, all about 10 or so, pigtails in wonderbread blonde or spunky red hair all spiky, looking normal as Hell but way too much like each other, raising a hunk of some peice of meat, […]
Edwardo Lambego stared down from the faux Italianate 19th century balcony that he’d spent the better part of the summer tearing down and rebuilding over and over again to appease the measured, insistent voice of the Italian tour guide AI that had gone all viral and infected his middle ear when he’d engaged in unprotected […]
They came in from the cold and headed straight for the bar. Considering they had a toddler in tow, I figured that they were either ordering food to go or I’d mistaken the child for a dwarf. Again. The woman was large, John Goodman in the first season of Roseanne large. Big and padded but […]